...in the strangest of places...

i don't have cable. shocker, right? the choice isn't really about being socially aware, etc. it's mostly about being cheap. cable/interweb is about $80 a month, and frankly, when you live in a one-income household, $80 can be a lot of money. consequently, when i do watch tv, it's usually pbs. i also have a terrible habit of watching movies over and over again. the other night, this actually paid off.

i was sitting in the middle of my bedroom floor, in some strange yoga pose, stretching my way through the end credits of "drop dead gorgeous" when this catchy little tune started playing. i must have rewound the dvd thirty times in a row, just to hear this song...not even the whole song, but the line that said, "why does this love always have to come to words?"

i mean, that's probably one of the most profound questions/statements i've ever heard, about anything. think about it...how many times do you find yourself motivated to speech or action out of love? i think we'd all be suprised to find out that we are motivated, activated, and empowered by love more often than any of us would like to admit. granted, that love can often be colored by less-than-honorable intentions...but when love is the primary motivator, incredible things can happen.

i've been re-reading "a brief history of time" by stephen hawking. aside from making me feel slightly learning impaired, this book makes me believe in a G-d that is so big, i almost lose my breath thinking about it. i don't think there's any way to view the space/time continuum, general reltivity, the awesome structure and fuction of dark matter, and the idea of the universe in constant motion without being open to the idea of a higher intelligence behind it.

i'm talking about a G-d that is bigger than any book, idea, word, savior, dogma, battle, war, manifesto, etc. i'm talking about a big G-d...REAL BIG. i'm talking about a G-d who loves out loud, who never lets the love be silent. i'm talking about a G-d so moved by love that the very sound of that love, the exhalation of that word/thought/state/feeling/emotion/action can still be heard from the deepest, furthest, darkest, and most mysterious places in the universe.

i'm talking about a macro love that designs the universe and organizes it in such incredibly small and minute detail that even super-computers can't count all the decimal places. i'm talking about a micro-love that changes our little lives, our businesses, our homes, our families, and our broken and wasted hearts. (and yes, that's a love i understand in the incarnation of G-d in Jesus)...i'm talking about a love that cannot be silent, that screams and hollers and sings at the top of it's lungs for right relationship.

i'm talking about a love that lays down beside us, in the quiet and dark of night, and brushes the hair back from our face, flips the pillow to the cool side, and holds us until we can sleep, again. i'm talking about a love that is compelled to be spoken, whether it's a whisper or a shriek.

"why does this love always have to come to words?"

if it's not out loud, how to do we know what love sounds like?

mil besos,

rmg