27 April 2006


pat o'briens in the french quarter on bachelorette party night. need i say more? moo and i put on our most alluring faces and went on a husband hunt. ok, not really, but we had a great time.  Posted by Picasa

the bride wore white...and lucious curls. caro has perfect hair. and she's married. i want to be caro when i grow up. Posted by Picasa

bridesmaids' running amok. cigars were as close to mayhem as we got...we were sternly warned about the use of adult bevs prior to nuptials. but the ladies have gots to have some fun...and the fun was had. Posted by Picasa

southern bridesmaid hair--it's all about the poof, people. it's all about the poof. and the little black dress helps, too. and some industrial strenght hair glue never hurts... Posted by Picasa

24 April 2006

ugh...

i hate to be a downer, but seriously...this takes the cake. i need a vacation from my subconscious. the wedding was wonderful, beautiful, glorious, and everything a wedding should be. and then i drove for 8 hours thinking about weddings, people in love, etc. it seriously jacked with my head, and i had bizarre and disturbing, and very lucid dreams for the better part of three hours this morning. it's never fun to wake up and want to cry. major, major blah.

in other news, related to my trip, new orleans looked better than i expected, but not as good as i hoped. i saw an alligator crossing the highway, a turtle crossing the highway, and some hateful woman outside houston took a huge dump and stopped up a toilet that i desperately needed to use. so, i plunged my first and (PLEASE TO GOD) hopefully last gas station toilet. and to add insult to injury, it was the kind of gas station that makes you buy something to use their bathroom. considering that i performed maintenence, i think i should have gotten a pass on the obligatory purchase. my only complaint, other than that, was that there was no graffitti in said bathroom, and now i have to invent someway to get the plunging story into my book. thoughts?

it's almost going-home time. i'm vacillating between stopping to work out, or just going home and going straight to bed, not passing go, and not collecting two hundred dollars. maybe i'll flip for it. or, i may be trapped in the computer room, because stinky j just stuck his hands down his pants and then proceeded to rub down the doorknob. i love this child, but he is a walking advertisement for strict and potent birthcontrol.

mil besos, and dreamless sleep--rmg

04 April 2006

long time coming

ok, so i will admit that blogging hasn't been on my to do list of late. but it has been on my mind. the truth of the matter is that i've been swamped with work, work, and a little bit more work. and when i do get a minute to myself, i've been trying to make myself run or go to curves, which seems to be the salvation of chubby housewives everywhere, and me, single, chubby, 27 me. lucky for me, today the soundtrack at curves was 80's girl rock. did i mention that in addition to working at my old summer camp, i also get to be a lifeguard? hence with all the running and self-improvement. oh, and i actulaly joined a tanning salon. you can pick youselves off the floor now. i even suprise myself, once in a while. the rest of the time, when i'm not working, or sleeping, or working off the 30 odd pounds of taco bell i packed onto myself in college, i'm trying like the dickens not to be so irritated by mundane crap. i'll let you in on a little secret: despite the charming personality i let you people see, i'm really quite easily irritated. and since my friend tpon told me once that me actually admitting my irritations made me "more edgy and less like pollyana always blowing rays of sunshine up people's posteriors", i'll let you in on the short list.

1. i am highly irritated and grossed out by the mucinex commercials. there's nothing more insulting and gross than talking and dancing snot wads in a conga line. in fact, it makes me want to just suffer through my allergy attacks than buy their stupid dancing snot wad product.

2. i am highly irritated and insulted that abc has commissioned a remake of the Ten Commandments. charlton heston IS moses, and the parting of the red sea is supposed to look like jello, crappily filmed on a sound stage. that's the way it happened, as far as i'm concerned. this is a travesty. and i will watch the new one, just so i can complain that it's not as good as the first one. btw, we had to watch the 1st version in my 6th grade social studies class when we studied ancient egypt. that would never happen anywhere else in the world, i guarantee it.

3. i hate that i watch 24 like a fiend. same goes for lost. i am cracked out on both of these shows. for someone who barely watched cable tv, or any tv, for the better part of four years, this is like eating a whole chocolate cake after months of doing adkins. not that i'd know anything about that...the shows are ridiculous to the point of being, well, ridiculous. smell the fart acting, implausible story lines, and crazy background music that makes my heart beat fast all combine to make my monday and wednesday nights complete. i'm really irritated that invasion is now on hiatus. that show sucks, too, but i have to watch it. it's like a compulsion. like how i have to have the closet door shut when i sleep, or can't stand to have open cabinet doors in the bathroom or the kitchen. i hate how much i like these shows.

4. sean hannity irritates me to the point of no return. i even like rush limbaugh better than i like sean hannity, and that's a hard thing for me to say. talk radio, since i'm now a part time office girl, has become a big part of my day. i can grin and bear it through rush, but sean hannity makes me want to listen to nails grating on a chalk board rather than his pedantic nattering. sorry, i mean his sanctimonious pedantic nattering. i hate it when i leave that part out. he's a hack. that's right, a hack. it's one thing to disagree with politics, it's another to just bully people and shout them down. i hope he's secretly a nice person at home, because he's a butthole at his job. that's right, a butthole. and i think he and bill o'reilly should be marooned on an island together, and have to figure out how to turn their egos into food and water. if they did that, we could solve the hunger issue immediately. imagine what we could do if we could turn their egos into petroleum products...the possibilities are endless.

5. i'm irritated by politics. that's all i'll say about that, because as the reigning raging liberal in my family, most of whom read this blog, i'd like to keep the peace, and still be invited to eat and visit, and live with them.

6. i'm irritated that you can't use airline miles whenever you want to. i know the reasons, i just don't like them.

7. i'm irritated that coke zero has aspertame in it. why can't they make it with splenda?

8. i'm irritated that i don't always trust my emotions enough to act on them. i'm irritated that i buffer my feelings and thoughts to be pleasing, accomodating, and nice. secretly, i hate being nice. there's a short list of people who i'd like to call out, yell at, tell how it is, etc. but i won't do that, probably ever, because the fall out just wouldn't be worth it. i'm irritated by people who continually crap away potential, hold on to things of which they should let go, don't keep up with current events, don't keep up with each other, and who wonder who's mad at them for not doing those things. i'm irritated that i censor those feelings, and don't say that to the people who need that said to them. it's just as bad as pretending everything is fine, when everyone knows it's not.

9. i'm irritated that i can only walk out of starbucks without a cd every other time i go in there. they have the best music. and i always get the most random stuff. it's worse than when i go to target, and come out with crap i don't need. or when i actually get to go to waterloo records, and buy music i've never heard of, listen to for a month, and then put away and don't listen to for another six months. madness!!

there. that's all. now you get why i'm not blogging lately. aren't you glad i ran out of energy and funny things (ok, mostly funny) things to say at number 9? taking the long view, i will say that things are well, for the most part. i'm healthy, my family is healthy. my nephew is cutting teeth, which is amazing to me. i've gotten the job i've wanted since i was 12, and even though it's just for the summer, i look forward to that time, in that place, with those people. things are moving forward for a great summer at camp. it's springtime, and the days are lovely.

mil besos--rmg

10 March 2006

automatic for the people

yeah, yeah, i know the title for my post is the name of an REM album. deal with it. if michael stipe liked women, i would want to marry him. what a great band...their music is certainly a part of my inner-soundtrack. if i made a record with music about my life, i would cover like 8 REM songs. ok, it would be more like a boxed set of records about my life, and since i'm such a rotten guitar player, the odds of me actually learning to play a quarter of those songs moderately ok is slim to none. and that's ok.

so, tuesday was quite the day in my little life. the morning started out like any other...hanging out with baby a and stinky j, trying to get a 15 minute power nap between the time stinky j got on the bus and when i had to put baby a in the shower, i was kept fully awake by stinky j's guinea pig (remind me when i have children to put a firm and solid ban on vermin as pets...), who kept banging on the bars of her cage (i know if i could hear her talk, she would have been chanting "attica, attica...") until i gave her some timothy grass. and then around 10 am, i got the call that little old me had been hired to be camp director for the summer at my old camp. you can read all about the things we do, etc. at www.campcapers.org

needless to say, i am ridiculously excited. and a little nervous. and that's ok. all will be well.

the world's fattest baby and finest purveyor of neck cheese weighs 15 pounds now, and is rolling over. and his parents reported that he has begun verbalizing in response to their talking to him. i am expecting him to speak any day now. i told you he was advanced. supposedly he's coming to visit in a couple of weeks. that will be a good weekend. i will be coaching him on his speech. i'm trying to decide which word i'd like to teach him first. as his aunt, i feel obligated to warp him in a loving way as soon as possible. like my friend e-beth, who taught her nephew to say "take a dump" instead of "go poo-poo". it was a big hit a day care. i can only hope that when my time comes to teach my nephew, i can do as well.

that's it, really. kind of boring, i know. but it's been a kind of boring month, except for the last week, which was nice. surreal, but nice. and i don't mean that in a notting hill sort of way.

mil besos--rmg

09 February 2006

long time, no blog

so, it's 1am on a thursday. i've been doing data entry for about 5 hours today, cataloguing state primary candidates. right now, i hate politics with a passion. although, it's incredible there aren't more contested primaries. that's kind of sad to me. although, i am glad to not have as many names to enter into my magical database. all i can say is that the movie "ray" is an excellent movie to type along to. mercy, me.

life is good, nevertheless. i'm still in flux, for those of you keeping score at home, but there is movement on the horizon, possibly.

i'm off to see my nephew this weekend. expect an obnoxious amount of pictures when i get back.

there will be new things to say, soon. i promise.

mil besos--rmg

12 January 2006

free minute

i have about fifteen unassigned minutes today, and all i have to say is that neil young's greatest hits just about rocked me out of my car yesterday. i remember the summer before i turned 16 as the summer i discovered neil young and learned how to drive a stick shift. both have had a lot to with how i turned out, i think. harvest was the album, and the rabbit was my car, and the back yard was my entire universe.

if i learned anything from neil young it is this: you don't have to have the world's greatest voice as long as you have something decent and beautiful to say, because at some point, the music just takes over and does what it will. and if you can write a great song and put a great harmonica solo in on top of it, you have written a truly classically kick-you-in-the-teeth-and-butter-your-biscuit great song. from the stick shift, i learned patience and finesse. i could use more stick shift driving in my life, i think. i know for a fact that i could use more neil young.

is it just me, or do harmonica solos just make you want to something crazy, like tear off all your clothes and go run screaming down the middle of the street because they are so freaking sweet? lucky for the rest of the free world that a) i have serious inhibitions and b) harmonica solos that sublime and amazing are few and far between. heart of gold, kids, that song is where it's at for little me, right now. geeze oh man.

i think i may be over-caffinated today. in fact, i'm sure of it. a large coffee drink from the 'bucks, several glasses of tea at lunch with mom and the grand'rents, and a diet coke with splenda made my lack of a nap today hardly noticiable. my plan is working...ah ha ha ha ha.

mil besos--rmg

11 January 2006

drive by...

ok, i'm not dead. i haven't given up blogging. i haven't baricaded myself in my room with four packages of double stuff oreos and five gallons of milk to die the perfect fat girl death. i've just been really, really, really, insanely busy. and it is a good feeling.

however, in between cleaning my room, doing laundry, running to kohl's to find cute clothes for my pseudo-business trip this weekend, and planning what is becoming a very busy spring and summer, i thought i'd jot off a little post to the old blog.

for those of you keeping score at home, we can chalk four points up to my side of the board for overall good utility play on last weekend's young adult vocational retreat. it was wonderful. and even though the gulf of mexico was a scorching 56 degrees, you can bet your sweet bippy that i went swimming. it was glorious. additionally, you can chalk another 5 points onto my side of the board for having the intestinal fortitude to drop myspace from my life before it became what we like to call " a real problem". geeze oh man, it was like a high school reunion on crack, and i could feel myself slipping into my desk at the back of the class and wishing to be cool, instead of just being cool. so, sorry to the myspace folk that i miss commenting on, but wow, i had to tear myself away. plus, there is such a thing as knowing too much. in the minus column, you can chalk two points in the stupid man column, regarding the heinous amount of crushing i have been suffering lately. i will be very glad when my hormones remember i am not 12 anymore. until then, my mind and my body will be reminding them on a half-hourly basis. remind me when telling white lies became ok, as long as you didn't mean any harm, because i'd like to get in on that action. seriously, people, seriously.

there is movement on the job front. that is all i am saying about that, because even though i am 27 and should no longer believe in such things, i don't want to jinx this.

the fattest baby in the world is coming to my house this weekend. sadly, i will be in indianapolis, shamelessly angling for a job. and no, it's not as a nascar nasty. indianapolis, apparently, is church conference central. so, i'll be trying to watch my language and act like a lady for 72 hours. i'll let you know how that goes. i think i am going to get the fattest baby in the world a treat, but the jury is still out about what i should get him. his grandmother has forbidden me to bring him back anything to do with nascar, although i'm sure his father would get a big kick out of that.

life is good. i think i still have some sand in my ears.

mil besos--r

28 December 2005

four calling birds...

merry fourth day of christmas, kiddies. hope you and yours had a blast. i think i will be sweating off christmas candy fumes until mid-march. life is good, and getting better all the time.

mil besos--r

i wanted to get a picture of mr. will in a christmas stocking, but the little fatty wouldn't fit. guess this shot of him looking perfectly angelic will have to do... Posted by Picasa

will and his cita...i'm not sure who likes who more, but these two were just about inseperable.  Posted by Picasa

will and his great-gramps, my poppy, had a big time on christmas eve. Posted by Picasa

will, already a very enterprising young man, is beginning to groom his hair to rival a certain mr. trump. watch out, wall street! Posted by Picasa

my little cousin brandon took this picture. he'd had enough sugar to sink a boat, so the only way to get him to be tolerable was to give him the camera. i am a sucker for a 7 year old sugar fiend. Posted by Picasa

will and me. this might be the cutest picture EVER. he looks like he knows a secret. Posted by Picasa

look at those hog jaws!!  Posted by Picasa

17 December 2005

merry christmas, happy hannukah. why yes, that IS a snotcicle hanging from my nose...

this is ridiculous. for the third christmas season in a row, i am monumentally sick. cedar fever is kicking my ass as we speak. in fact, my doc stopped just short of giving me steroids, so i'm not the total wuss i thought i was. my allergies really are that bad. and i feel horrid. seriously bad. like so bad that i had a meeting in san antonio today, and i didn't even put on make up to go. and i had no idea if there were going to be cute boys there-- and i still didn't feel well enough to put on make up.

i'm sitting in my bed, wrapped up in an old, thick, blue plaid robe that i liberated from my dad when i was 17 or so, cuddled up in my down comforter, listening to leonard cohen singing about the sisters of mercy, and wishing i could quit hacking up wads of god-knows-what. the bright spot-- last night, i wrapped almost all of my christmas presents, and it's almost time for me to have more nose spray. it's really the little things that are getting me by, today.

seriously, this is the worst time of year to be sick. i have such a love/hate relationship with christmas, anyway, this really just adds insult to injury. it was like right at the moment i was really getting into the spirit of christmas, i started feeling like utter poo. what the hell? i love texas, i was born here, and i will die here. but i freaking hate cedar trees with the white hot intensity of 10 thousand suns. seriously, seriously.

ok, it's nose spray time. i'm sure you're grossed out by now, anyway. i know i am.

happy, merry, pleasant, blah blah blah.

happy birthday, jesus. even though you were probably born sometime in september...

07 December 2005

imagine

i know it's cliche. but i miss john lennon, even though i didn't know him. what a polarizing figure...i mean, he almost got deported from the US. he had bed-ins. he made art. he wrote songs that are so deeply embedded in my psyche that invariably a lennon song is on my internal soundtrack at least once a day. when i found out i was going to new york for the first time, strawberry fields was on the list of places to see--high up on that list, i might add. i was so intent on finding it, and so turned around in central park that i made esteban ask motorcycle cops for directions.

i wonder what john lennon would have been like as an elder statesman. i'm sure his children wonder the same thing. i guess it's a little safer for me to wonder what john lennon would have been like as an old man that it is for me to wonder the same thing about my own dad. funny how we make conjecture safe, sometimes, isn't it?

in other news, my nephew looks just like me. and apparently, is also terrifically gassy. i'm afraid more and more that my brother and sister-in-law have had my child, and that i will somehow have theirs. it's been known to happen.

i have got to get into the christmas spirit and quit being such a grinch. maybe this weekend's festivities and shopping will turn the trick. either that, or i can just buy a bottle of maker's mark and fake my way through it. i'll keep you posted. i mean, it's not that i don't like christmas, or that i don't love my family, and all that goes with holiday stuff. i just can't get excited right now, about anything. i guess it's realizing that i've been out of my old job for almost 6 months, and all the stuff i thought i would have accomplished in those 6 months is pretty much not done.

granted, i have gotten some sleep, which i desperately needed. i no longer cry at the drop of a hat. i have actually written some of my book, and taken a few pictures. i just figured by the time new year's came around, i'd be ready to shop some treatment chapters around, and i'm increasingly aware that i don't have enough material with which to do that. and i've had a couple of tepid reviews from my peeps, so i'm kind of gun shy at this point about doing anything with it. like maybe writing what i've got was just a really long journal entry, and that's secretly where it belongs. i dunno. it's hard for me to be objective about what i'm trying to make. and try as i might, i am having a hard time divorcing my essays from the pictures i've taken, even though i know i could get by with just captions. i guess i've realized that i do have something to say, i just don't know how loud i need to say it.

life is good, even when it's complicated. i DO have a purpose and a mission--but it's my job to figure that out, and then DO it with gusto. if i can dream it, i can do it.

jingle-jingle.

mil besos--rmg

30 November 2005

love is like a coffee mug

i know, weird title for a post, huh? but i've been thinking this thought for the last three days, and didn't know what else to do but "say" it out loud.

love is like a coffee mug. or at least the kind of love i want, is. so i guess maybe i should say that relationship is like a coffee mug. i have a great affinity for coffee mugs. especially the really big kind, like the huge latte cups you get in coffee shops. caro bought me a big one with a sheep on it for christmas one year. i drink out of that one a lot, because it's big-big, and because it's pretty, and because one of my nearest and dearest gave it to me. but i digress.

see, i've been thinking a lot about relationships lately. ones i've had, ones i've wished i had, ones i imagine i will have at some point. and it all sort of comes back to the same thought-- a coffee mug. see, coffee mugs are sturdy, usually made kind of thick, to keep what's inside good and warm, with a good handle, so you can hang on, or pull it to you. coffee mugs contain, they don't keep. you don't put a lid on a coffee mug. coffee mugs can carry lots of different things---sometimes coffee, or tea, sometimes pens or paperclips, or puzzle pieces. coffee mugs can be refilled, reheated, washed out, and even put away, sometimes. coffee mugs aren't bones of contention, because there are enough coffee mugs for everyone to have whichever one they chose. coffee mugs don't actually fix your coffee, or other tasty beverage, they just take what you are willing to pour into them, and offer that same bit back, when you are ready to have it back. coffee mugs don't suddenly decide to be plates one day, either. and everyone knows immediately that the thing in your hand or on your desk is a coffee mug, and not a tea pot. coffee mugs are painfully obvious, but elegantly purposeful. they can deal with a lot of abuse, and with a little elbow grease and a resolve to be a little more careful, can usually be fixed up if they chip in a place or two. and if they shatter altogether, the shards make nice craft fodder, so at least you can be creative, if you can't have your thirst sated, anymore.

at any rate, this thought may have something to do with the fact that i am embarking on a monumental case of cedar fever as we speak, or it's brilliant, and i just don't have the brain power to fully flesh this one out at the moment.

that's what i think, for today, anyway.

mil besos--rmg

29 November 2005

lessons learned

i learned today that after i brush baby a's teeth, it's best not to feed him for about a half hour. how did i learn this lesson--he threw up on me. that was a good lesson to learn. i feel bad for him, and bad for my snowflake pajama pants. but mostly, i feel bad for him. he's not feeling very well at the moment, but motrin and a few breathing treatments, and some tlc should put him back to rights.

i also learned today that stinky j shouldn't ever drink two bottles of gatorade if he's going to be around me for a prolonged period of time, and still be allowed to see his 13th birthday. i also learned that the only thing that can be gained from arguing about whether or not padme and queen amidala are the same person with stinky j is a headache and the strong craving for a drink and a smoke. here's the kicker-- he stayed home from school with a stomach complaint, and wore around the tightest pair of boxer shorts i have ever personally seen. when asked why he was wearing those boxers, and only those boxers, he would only gesticulate with his light saber, and threaten me with various forms of the jedi mind trick. oh, friends and neighbors, it is hard to be that kid. don't get me wrong, i love the little guy, but oh wow, do we have some ground to cover...

i learned this weekend that thanksgiving is about family, or rather i re-learned it. poppy was in the hospital over the holiday, and rather than cancel dinner at the house and keep the turkey in the freezer, we had dinner for relatives, anyway. and it was fine. and i still go to see poppy. and i learned how to make dressing. poppy is out of the hospital, now, and is recouperating at home, under the watchful eye of my grammy. hopefully, he'll be back to his old tricks by christmas. on thanksgiving, i was thankful for my crazy family, who always seems to come around when they are most needed, bringing pies and love.

i learned this weekend that 300 miles going to see my nephew is much shorter than 300 miles driving away from him. that kid is going to be a heartbreaker. i am making a short list of tricks to teach him. i'd also like to report that he smiled (ok, it was prolly just gas, but whatever, i got a picture of him) and almost rolled over. he's very advanced. and he has dimples, which means that he's a little bit like me. i like that. his 'cita says that he looks like me when he cries. she should know, since i did nothing but cry until i was 9 monts old. at any rate, will and his parents are doing very well. i will be boring you to death with more pictures soon.

i learned that it's best not to listen to dave matthews or ryan adams while pondering things about your love life, or lack thereof. same goes for the garden state soundtrack. i learned that when you feel like the universe is screwing you on the relationship deal, it's best to just pretend you don't feel that way, and plaster a smile on your face, and keep doing what you're doing, because the universe is a funny thing. so, i'm doing my thing, and saying my prayers to the baby jesus, and hoping this angsty feeling passes, or that something wonderful will come along and grow into something amazing.

i also learned that even though i'm 27 years old, i'd still rather talk to my mom about matters of the heart than just about any one else. she's a keeper, that one. and even though she can't fix any of the issues, she listens and offers her take on things, and even though things are exactly the same as when we started talking, i feel oddly better.

i learned that even after a two year hiatus, i can still make a mean marinara sauce.

i learned that three week olds make very odd noises, and baby gas smells just as bad as grown up gas does. wow.

i learned that i dislike houston and it's proclivity for municipalities and chambers of commerce more that i dislike dallas for that same reason. see, i can say nice things about dallas.


end of lessons, for today.

mil besos--rmg

21 November 2005

not necessarily the news

ok, people. not to sound too much like joan rivers, but can we talk? seriously...i was just over at my grandparents' house printing out some lobby stuff, and chatting with them about thanksgiving plans, when i almost had a fit. a certain news agency that is almost constantly on at their house (no names, but i will tell you that at one time the pelt of this animal was used in couture clothing...until peta went on the kool-aide drinking war-path--but that's another rant) was covering a "major news development" complete with ultra-cool music and tight shots from local affiliates. it was a story about a plane with a wonky landing gear. a corporate jet with a wonky landing gear, not a major air-carrier, like last time. let me say that while i feel a measure of sympathy for people in air-planes with mechanical issues, i do not consider every incidence news worthy. more to the point, i feel like the only reason news agencies broadcast this kind of story is in the macabre hope that something goes wrong and they can get more gore and guts on their broadcast than the other guys, or at least get the guts and gore first. this is, to put it mildly, bullshit of the highest order.

in case anyone forgot, there are hard hitting news stories waiting to be picked up on a daily basis. and they aren't all about blood and guts, or which elementary school teacher banged and then married a student. the stories to be reported aren't all about politicians in washington screwing the rest of the country, one way or the other. the stories to be reported aren't all about little old ladies getting mugged by gang bangers. the stories aren't all about bigots, or zealots, or other run-of-the-mill crazies. there are stories about men and women who succeed in the face of insurmountable obstacles, dogs that help epileptic children, schools for at risk youth with 90% graduation statistics, start-up non-profits that change people's lives with everyday items and run on a shoe-string budget, schools in iraq that get opened and DON'T get firebombed, and the list goes on and on. but instead of those stories, we get more blood, more guts, more gore, more half-truths, more deciet, and less hope. and i think that's a travesty.

bobby kennedy said that he wanted not to see the world as it was and ask why, but to see the world as it could be and ask why not. i wish that those of us who dare to feel that way could have a venue of expressing that in the media. for instance, i wonder what it would be like if all the news media in america decided that on every wednesday, during their prime-time slots, they would focus on four incredible things that happened that day. do you think people would watch it? do you think that people would look forward to prime-time on wednesday nights? do you think the newscasters would look forward to bringing not just the news, but good news to their audience? or do you think that people would like it for about a month, and then get bored and call for a return to regular programming? i wonder. i wonder what it would do for media outlets that ambulance chase, dig for blackmailable info, exploit sources, and create drama. i wonder what it would do for a sense of esprit de corps and civitas that seem to be totally lacking in american society today.

i bet we would start to think of the news and newsmakers in a different light. i bet we would start seeing each other differently. i bet what we think of as being newsworthy would get turned on its head, such that when important, sobering things are reported, we would pay better attention to them, because we wouldn't be so numb to another plane crash, or bombing, or school shooting. maybe we could start looking at our neighbors as people who share our space, instead of people who maybe should be viewed with suspicion, because they look different than we do. maybe we could be vigilant about hope, vigilant about nuturing the potential that lies within us and our neighbors. maybe we wouldsee the world through different eyes, and get different results.

i'm not saying that everything on the news is bad, or that we have become a nation of humbugs. i'm just saying that i think we can do better. as for myself, i promise to do better, to try and find four things everyday that are special and good and amazing. and i will try to put them here.

today's four things:
1) a phone call from an old friend, who after two months, remembered my birthday
2) frozen cadbury eggs
3) stinky j's incredibly good mood, in spite of being 12 and moody most of the time
4) beauregard the dog is bouncing back from his arthritic drama this weekend


mil besos--rmg

18 November 2005

oh wow, southpark strikes again

stinky j, my 12 year old cousin, dvr's all the episodes of southpark. this is a very good thing for our relationship. one, it gives us some common ground, and two, it gives me another reason not to tie him into a human knot on a daily basis. additionally, even though i'm 27 years old, my mother hates southpark, and doesn't like to let me watch it. i know, i know. some things never change.

ok, so this week's episode is PURE genius, which was totally lost on stinky j. the southpark guys (trey and matt) did what i have wanted to do for weeks-- they went after tom cruise. and it was brilliant. seriously, you should take five minutes to read the wikipedia entry on scientology. if that isn't enough lead you to spend untold hours tracking down info on the church of scientology, a) you just aren't trying hard enough, or b) you have a real job and no desire to read minutae about random religious philosophy. which is fine, just be prepared when i school your butt in trivial pursuit.

you have GOT to get your hands on this episode. it even made the cnn.com front page. freaking tom cruise with his annoying love proclamations (don't even get me started on his manic goofiness...talk about contrived, people), the way he chewed out matt lauer, and called brooke shields a drug addict, and proclaimed adderall a street drug. and then says he knows the "history" of psychology. yeah, sure ya do, tommy boy, sure ya do.

i mean, i get that not every kid with add or adhd needs drugs. and i get that it seems like every month, we discover a new mental issue. i get that. it frustrates me, sometimes. sometimes, i worry that maybe i have a freak mental issue based solely around being mostly, painfully, normal. however, that does not change the fact that mental illness is a real thing. behavior issues do exist, and sometimes need to be medicated. psychologists, psychiatrists, and counselors are part of the glue that holds western society together. sure, some of them may be quacks, but they are the exception rather than the rule. we can all do with more talking, more feeling, more direction, and for some people, that is done in a therapy setting. and i have a real problem with someone who says that is not real, or that it's evil, or bad, or counter-productive to self-actualization.

as for the freak out on the opra show, i'd like to point out that it looks like tommy boy ate a great big box of crazy. and i don't mean the love kind. i mean the kind where you can either paint your whole apartment in three hours or shave off all your body hair a la bob geldof. i would shudder to think that THAT little display is what i have in store when i finally fall in love. love can make you do silly things, but getting all goo-goo in front of the entire tv viewing world is pushing the envelope. THAT little display is why some people think adderall is a good idea. THAT little freak out, coupled with his nasty remarks re: mental health have spurred me to boycott future tom cruise projects. i say future because i do adore top gun and a few good men. and born on the fourth of july. and far and away. but that's about it.

end of rant. peace out.

mil besos--rmg

mil besos--rmg

09 November 2005


william michael graves--welcome to the world, darlingest boy. i promise to love you my whole life. i promise to listen to your adventures and misadventures with my full attention. i promise to be your friend and take you to the zoo. i promise to get you hopped up on sugar and then take you home to your mom and dad. i promise to remember you birthday, and always send you something random. i promise to think about you everyday, and be grateful to God that i know you. i promise to burn lots of gas coming to see you, and i promise i will never complain about the long drive. i promise i will never be too tired to tell you a story or sing you a song. i promise i will ask your mom and dad before i take you to the movies or let you try a new food or drive my car. i promise to make you watch the sun come up at least one time in our life together. i promise to take pictures of you covered in bluebonnets. i promise to burp you after i give you a bottle. i promise to tell you stories about your daddy when he was a little boy. i promise to get you out of jams, when i can help, and to give you inside info on crazy family members. i promise to hold you as much as i can without being a baby hog. mostly, i just promise to love you every day more than i love you today, better than i love you today. you are the newest in a long line of people i love. i promise to be generous with my love, to tell you how much i love you every time i see you.  Posted by Picasa

will, while a huge fan of the university of texas, is not a fan of his similac with iron formula. see evidence of both-- on his head, and on his lip. this is still the cutest spit up i have ever seen in my whole life. Posted by Picasa

will's 'cita, upon his arrival. this was one happy grandma! Posted by Picasa

parenthood--it's an amazing thing.  Posted by Picasa

will's response to his first bath. i have a feeling that this only minor compared to how he will feel when he's two and covered in something way nastier than baby cheese. Posted by Picasa

seth and monica-- proud parents. good job, kiddies. Posted by Picasa

proudest auntie in all the wide world. this was the best day, ever. Posted by Picasa

will, sleeping under my HUGE hand. look at all that hair! Posted by Picasa

02 November 2005

this is the life

ah...i had a pot of chai this morning...and made 81 phone calls (that's right, 81, not counting call backs and wrong numbers) in my snow flake pajama pants. i HEART contract jobs. seriously. and bob dylan sang to me the whole time. life is better.

btw, does anyone know what the arrondo plant is? i can't find anything out about it. apparently, it's bad, because the calls i was making this morning are all about this expo dealing with the safety of arrondo herbicides and arial distribution of said herbicide. info anyone?

mil besos--rmg

01 November 2005

happy hour, anyone?

this lady needs an extra-strength martini, with extra olives, and a set of balls so she can say "no" to more projects. i just got done with a very unsatisfying planning meeting, for an even this weekend, which up until the meeting, i felt pretty good about. now, not so much. i am so irritated that i took time out of my day to drive for and hour each way to do a freaking status update, to find out that two people still hadn't done things i'd asked them to to four weeks ago. i almost threw a fit. i did manage to gracefully remind them that i was on a schedule and that we had shit to do , so to please keep tangents to a minimum. why do i feel like a bitch? yuck!remind me that i'm doing this because i like people and love the baby jesus. remind me that my way isn't the only way to get things done. remind me that it's ok to call people out when they are being dumbasses and wasting my time and others. remind me, ok?

and then, i find out that the lobby job is getting ratcheted up by a LONG shot, which means more green for me, but also more research and lots more phone calling. remind me why this is a good idea. remind me that this is keeping my foot in the door for other things, and giving me great work experience and networking capabilities. remind me,ok?

geeze oh man, when did my little life get so freaking busy? this morning, i was all in the dumps about neglecting my social life, and wondering how in the hell i was going to save myself from being a hermit for the rest of my life. suddenly, that seems like a moot point.

ok, enough griping. i have phone calls to make, and media contacts to track down. i love you crazy people.

mil besos--rmg

30 October 2005

a day at the races...

no, we didn't win big fat money at the track, yesterday. i know you all probably thought that i hadn't updated this weekend because i was busy blowing a small fortune on tacky jewelry at claire's boutique. no, that was not the case at all. we got seated behind this girl who was cruising on some kind of goof ball, and who fixed her hair every minute or so. and she was a chronic foot tapper. i almost had a fit. it was v. distracting, and my nerves were quite frayed.

i was very glad to get home, even though i didn't make any money. mom and i proceeded to watch crappy tv-- except for the shining, which scared the crap out of me, and drank hot toddies, for the frayed nerves, of course. it was a nice evening in.

recipe for hot toddies (courtesy of the future mrs. alex christman):
1.5 oz bourbon
1/4 lemon
1 T honey
5oz hot water
lather, rinse, repeat

mil besos--rmg

28 October 2005

ah, the wonders of technology

so, i'm putting this database together for a lobbying firm in austin. it's all about transportation stuff, which i find horribly boring. at any rate, in my quest for more information, i've had to reasearch community service organizations in four metropolitian areas in texas. some conclusions i have reached: the lion's club needs to invest in a faster server, and include more info on their site that is actually useful. dallas has more municipalities and clubs than any one city has a right to, further cementing my intense dislike of all things dallas, except for my friends who have made the decision to live in the metroplex, and neiman marcus, of course. btw, doesn't metroplex sound like a) a really goofy wrestling move, or b) a really ginormous mall?

my faithful dog, beauregard, has some nasty gas today, which is about the only thing keeping me awake while i cut and paste phone numbers, email addresses, ect. into a word document, so i can print all the info out and dump it into access. blah, oh so boring. i feel like i'm whoring myself out for this job. which i pretty much am, since i'm mostly opposed to lobbying, and could give a crap about whether or not texdot has enough info to get the votes it wants for prop 1. i'm probably not supposed to be telling you all this, but i am, anyway.

thank God for bob marley. and earl grey tea. and my farting dog. they are helping maintain some sanity while i do what any simian with moderate dexterity could accomplish just as quickly as i can. finding out that lobbying was about as sexy as my policy job in dc was is kind of eye opening. talk about things not being what they appear to be. geeze oh man. i keep telling myself i'm not selling out for supplemental income, that i'm just collecting information. but i secretly don't believe that for a minute. i fear i am part of what my friends and i refer to as "the problem", and by that i mean special interest infiltration of our beloved/beloathed (is that a word? if not, it should be...) democracy. eww, sick out. on the other hand, i feel like the baby jesus doesn't want me to be in debt for the rest of my life, so this is ok, because i'm not doing anything against the law, his or the u s of a. i don't know. i do know that the lobby folks think i am a freaking genius and like the work i've already given them, so i guess that's good.

i'm going to the track this weekend, with the fam. it's the breeder's cup. mom and poppy have been doing their homework, so maybe we'll win some money. my grammy and i decided to avoid our homework, and follow our own method. it's highly scientific, and has paid off a number of times, large and small. we pick horses based on their names, and sometimes what color they are. and sometimes we just have a gut feeling, and bet on that horse. laugh if you want, but i made $92 on that method at the kentucky derby. so there.

the book is moving somewhat slowly, and that kind of makes me feel like a slacker. it's starting to diverge into two very separate projects. the graffitti book is my main focus, though. the other, which a few of you may have glanced at, is more of a collection of extended journal entries. i have no idea if i will do anything with that, because i don't know how readable it would be to most people. strong opinions abound in my cobwebby little brain, and i'm not sure if i spent the rest of my life trying, that i could explain everything i feel and think about the things i feel strongly about or spending time pondering. that sentence prolly doesn't make much sense, but i know what i mean.

ok, it's back to the lions' club and their freakishly slow server. i hope the kiwanis folks invested a little more in theirs...

peace out. word to your mother.

mil besos--r

26 October 2005

what i really meant to say was...

in the meantime
in between time
there's a fine line between
where you are and where you want to be

on the flip-side
in the shadow
there's a memory of
who you were and who you want to be

on the other hand
in the spotlight
there's a stage lit up
for who you are to all the rest of the world

in the middle, in the twilight, in the gloaming
that's where you get it right.
in the learning, in the burning, in the wrestling
with the angel with all your might.
in the leaving, in the weaving, in the weeping
of the tears you were once too brave to cry
in the trying, in the dying, in the running
of the great life race you just know you can win
you just might find the courage to begin, again.

across the fine lines on your face
across the stage lights in your eyes
across the oceans of the tears that you've cried
across the barrens of your mind
across the wastelands of your heart
across the plenty and the passions and the fears that you hold dear
there's still the change to make it somehow right.

things that vex

some people write about things they like. not me. here's some stuff that drives me nuts...

deer proof fences

the "new lynyrd skynyrd" and the "new doors". also, the "new inxs" and the idea of a new janis joplin.

allergies

when your feet get all cold at night, and you can't warm them up unless you sleep with the heating pad on them. and then you wake up, and they're all sweaty and gross, and you can't go back to sleep because you feel like you've just been in your running shoes.

soaring gas prices

lying politicians

lying media pundits

third world debt

making the effort to take time to send real emails to multiple people, and only getting like two back. nothing like that to make one feel like a total social leper and world's dullest/least favorite/most mediocre friend.

the death penalty

child abuse

pornography

meth

the fact that pot is illegal

waiting for the one phone call you really want and never getting it

trying to go to sleep and not being able to turn off your brain

thinking of the right thing to say two minutes after it would have been appropriate to say

sleep depravation

wasting water

hummers, h2, and the even dumber h3--basically any car that gets less than 15 miles to the gallon

poachers

hurricanes, unless they come in a take-home glass from pat o'briens

misplacing $5

misplacing $50

postage stamps and the fact that they used to only cost like 20 cents when i was little

crappy books

crappy movies

crappy music--like nashville country or britany spears, pretty much anything top 40

people who say they don't like to read

people who say they don't watch the news

the fact that i really do like vh1

the fact that if there is a celine dion song on the radio, i am almost compelled to stop and listen, and sometimes, sing along

traffic

people who don't pick up after their dogs

the way a copy machine smells right before it decides to die

running out of toilet paper and not having anyone to go get more, or having anyone in the next stall you can ask for help

walking into a bathroom and hearing someone throwing up their toenails

cheap vodka

cheap tequila

cheap watercolors and bad brushes

bono NOT winning the nobel peace prize

days when you desperately want to have something good to say, but know that you really just need a) a good cry, and b) a good bitch session.

wonder which today is...

all is well, just a blah day.

mil besos--rmg

19 October 2005


you have no idea the power of the dark side, friends and neighbors. no idea, at all. the shear force of this kid's gas is more impressive than any light saber known in the cosmos. and by the way, the helmet has sound effects. oh yes, he can breathe just like darth vader. i'm waiting for him to try and fit his trumpet under that thing.  Posted by Picasa

debauchery.  Posted by Picasa

this is my sister-in-law. i adore this girl. seriously, she's one of my top 10 favorite people in the world. and she fits right in, baby.  Posted by Picasa

an east texas mullet...is there any thing finer? i bagged this one the last time i was at my brother's house. the writing on this mullet's shirt said "red neck and blue collar". i heart it. Posted by Picasa

a lady loves this picture. this is the famous esteban. known for his great affection for me, and vodka. it's good to be loved.  Posted by Picasa

i don't even have the first idea WHO took this picture. since it was on my camera, i'm guessing it was me.  Posted by Picasa

another day, another dollar

this was a long day. granted, i did get a power nap this afternoon, for which i am profoundly grateful, but it was still a long day. i had lunch with erin and max this afternoon, to discuss college conferece. i think it went quite well, up until a point. ( i should point out that i shamelessly rip off other people's funny material ALL THE TIME. i'm funny, but only moderately so. i stop just short of actually co-opting other people's personal stories, and adding my name in the right places. even that is hard for me. i am a humor mercenary.) so, my friend mike (who's wife's blog you can read, and who's child you can adore @ prolly.blogs.com) is a tukong student. tukong is a martial art form that is very difficult, and very intense. i give mike grief about it sometimes, because students of tukong are referred to as "special combat warriors", and from his discription and my over-active imagination, i assume his master looks like a human verson of shredder from the teen age mutant ninja turtles. there's also a lot of talk about the "death blow", which gives a lot of street cred to just about anything. at any rate... i'm sitting at lunch with erin and max, and we move from talking about college conference into talking about summer camp staff, and how the college kids can sometimes have a very crappy attitude. we talked about being the enforcer, etc. to which i replied that i should come up to camp training to scare the kids. i could carry around a cigar, make threats, carry around a riding crop, and look mean for a week, kind of like marlon wayan's character "major pain". i then made the comment, "well, you know, i am a special combat warrior" which, considering the topic at hand, was a total non-sequitor. max laughed so hard that he spewed dr pepper out of his nose. and then he threw up a little bit. erin and i immediately evacuated the taco cabana patio for the safety of my car, max adjourned to the men's room. seriously, i am not making this up. it was quite funny. in case you were wondering, my return button is on the blink right now, and i just don't feel like rebooting and losing this post. deal. so, i came back home, and hung out with stinky j and baby a for the afternoon. stinky j decked himself out in his darth vader helmet and light saber, and threatened me with his glowing piece of plastic. oooo the dark side. it was very scary, in a lot of ways. some days i look at that kid, and i can't wait to have one of my own. other days, i get one look at him, and my biological clock moves from NOW to NEVER. geeze oh man. pictures to follow. mil besos--rmg

17 October 2005

what a weekend

my head still hurts a little bit, and i'm fairly certain my liver won't forgive me for what i did to it for a while. what can i say, it was a weekend of debauchery with esteban and co., and i lived the life of a high dollar hag. and i have to say, i felt like the prettiest straight girl in the club they took me to.

additionally, i should take this time to apologize for all those stray text messages i sent out on friday night/saturday morning. oops. lucky you. if you ever wanted dirt to use against me if i ever run for political office, now you have it.

i will post some pictures later. and speaking of pictures, i got some good bathroom graffitti this weekend. in fact, while i was snapping a picture friday night, in the ladies' room, mind you, a man kicked me out of the stall because he "had to take a wizz". i told him that was no excuse to rush great art, to which esteban replied, "yeah, i'm her gaygent!" we both thought that was VERY funny, but the guy who had to go to the potty did not.

more stories later. baby a had to stay home from school today with a fever, and needs to be rocked for a little while.

mil besos and double shots for the house--rmg

07 October 2005

they've though of everything...

whatever you look at online for the whole rest of the day, please look at this! seriously, people, what the hell?

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20051007/ap_on_fe_st/ig_nobels

we can put a man on the moon, create what's featured in the above link, put shaq into your phone, run infomercials for ronco products 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, but we can't figure out how to get people off welfare, end hate crimes, cure cancer, or create a vaccine for aids. geeze oh man, people. at least we can say we have plastics, and thereby, the whoopie cushion. See, G-d does have a sense of humor, and i'm sure He/She is laughing at this one...

mil besos--rmg

05 October 2005

i'd like an extra shot with that, please

today started at 6am. that's right, 6am. i know, this is a totally different rachel than you are all used to knowing. let me give you a brief review of what's new in my world, or rather give you a rundown of what my days are sort of like...

5:45am-- first alarm goes off. i go back to sleep.

6:00am--last alarm goes off. i get myself up and throw on some clothes i laid out the night before.

6:30am-- i arrive at my cousin sabrina's house to get baby a ready for school

8:15is am-- baby a's bus arrives and carries him away to school after i wave goodbye at the end of the driveway. i start a load of laundry so i can make the kid's bed before he gets home from school, and i head back to my house. on my way, i either stop at starbucks for some rocket fuel, or go tell my grandparents hello, if they are awake.

9am-2:30pm-- arrive home. good days, i nap for a couple of hours. this week, i've been doing a database job for some friends in austin who have a lobbying firm. other days, i've made a trip to san antonio to do some consulting and event planning for ye olde diocese of west texas. who knew my exile would ever end. somewhere in there i eat lunch, make phone calls, and manically check my email. old habits die hard.

2:30pm-- head back over to sabrina's to get ready for the boys to get home. stinky j gets home at 3:30, and has to do homework and bitch about being 12. this takes a while. baby a gets home at 4, and gets some formula and water in his n.g. tube. we hang out, and i mostly laugh at stinky j trying to do his spelling homework. i've been making him do flashcards, and can report that he's getting almost all a's on his tests. and he can spell turquoise. baby a and i lay on the floor and stretch, and watch felicity re-runs and the food network. sometimes we watch little house on the prairie. and i work some more on my database project and try to convince stinky j that burning down the house is a bad idea, and that the gigantic black lab really should live outside, because he slings snot and hair everywhere.

7:45pm-- hook baby a up to his night feed and give him his night meds, with a kiss and a cuddle. and i ask stinky j to be the good kid i know he is deep inside, and i go home to momma.

8pm--get home. momma feeds me and we talk. i usually remember to do the dishes and the odd load of laundry.

9pm-- back to my computer to do more work on the database. it's a killer, man. do you know how many chambers of commerce are in the dallas-fort worth metro area? they are freaking legion. seriously, like at least 120. and those are just the ones google pulled up.

somewhere between 11pm and 1am-- brush my teeth and go to bed.

and now you know all my secrets. well, at least the ones with which i am willing to part.

four weeks til dallas with missy and caro.

three weeks til we find out if i can still plan an event without screwing too much up.

three weeks til wurstfest-- yay beer and sausage. no throw up rides with stinky j this year, seriously.

two months til baby will discovers the world.

one month til the red sox win the world series, again.

about 30 minutes until i check my eyelids for holes.

mil besos--rmg

01 October 2005

road side revelation

i drove by southpark meadows on my way home. what i saw made me a little sick to my stomach. instead of the amazing outdoor music venue that was a part of my young adult memory, and the memories of a lot of people i went to college with, there were the makings of a strip mall. a freaking strip mall...like we need another one?

about 12 million years ago, i saw hordefest there. remember hordefest? it was kind of like lalapalooza, on with less well known bands. i saw blues traveler there, right after they released their first album, when john popper was still a fatty. hook was, and still is, one of my top twenty favorite songs, and i remember how i felt the first time i heard it. that song made me want to walk into a room full of my friends, with a beer in one hand, and a good conversation on my lips. sure, i know it's a song about peter pan and wendy. sure i know the chord progression is predictable, and based on pachelbel's canon in d. but it's a great song. and for one period, over six weeks, i played that song first thing in the morning. and that was about four years after the album came out. i drove my housemates crazy. that freaking song still ends up on my mix lists and on mix cd's about 7 times out of 10.

the day i saw blues traveler was a plain old august day, right before i turned 20. it was rainy, and gross, and i saw ben harper right before we went to the b.t. stage. we were sticky, and i was on the verge of begging to be taken home. and then john popper started playing his harmonica. the clouds parted, the pipes came out, and the sticky, sweet, cloying smell of youth and hash mingled and made music of their own. i stood in the crowd, and because i was terrified of being arrested, i didn't smoke the pot, but i was mesmerized by the music. enfolded in it, almost. and i was glad to be alive, in G-d's creation, listening to music that made my heart happy.

i saw dave matthews play at southpark, as well. my friend kerry and i tried to sneak in an icecream bucket full of margaritas, but the security people did their job, and confiscated our sweet treat. the show was amazing. satellite is one of the most sublime songs ever, in my eyes, at least. i remember being 16 and hearing dave on a cassette tape in my friend dustin's bedroom, after i'd given him a haircut, and thinking that it was one of the coolest things ever. i went to the wally, and bought my own cassette tape of dave, and wore the damn thing out. seriously, i warped the tape from listening to it over and over in the tape player in my old rabbit.

dave was great on the day i saw him. i still maintain it was one of the best live shows i've ever seen. he played all my favorites, and played two step, my second favorite dave song. and celebrate, we did. because life is short, but sweet for certain... ah dave, you are a quaker, and that makes you dear to my heart, not just because of all the tasty oatmeal, but because of the good theology and loving-kindness the friendly folk espouse.

and now, a place of song (and st. augustine says that "he who sings prays twice", so you do the math...) has become a place of commerce, which isn't to say that music isn't commerce. it's a strip mall, more of the same, marketing the sameness that we all seem to want, but say we don't. i know that change is the only thing that is constant. i get it. it just made me a little sad to see such a pretty piece of land, a natural amphitheater with incredible acoustics, and a place that had some memories of mine in it's recesses be turned into something utterly ordinary. blah.

i swear if they ever threaten to pave zilker park, or make more parking spaces by barton springs to put in a wal-mart, i will chain myself to the moontower like those armpit hair girls do with the trees in oregon.

end of rant...rachel OUT!

mil besos--rmg